C'est Nice

you tell me.

we're really getting down to it, here, aren't we? my departure is imminent and i feel... like maybe i don't believe it's going to happen. i do have that whole "counting down the last classes before break" feeling, but not the "i'm getting on a plane and flying over an ocean" feeling. i couldn't begin to tell you why, but these days, i feel like that's standard.

so, charlotte has yet another friend visiting this weekend, chris. he's a strange bloke, although not bad. i'm letting my imagination get away with itself, allowing myself to see things that aren't there. no advances, certainly (i'm not hallucinating... not yet, at least), but the little signs which i know mean next to nothing, yet still manage to color entire landscapes of imagined, hoped for romance.

actually, one of the first things i noticed about him (and still notice, from time to time) is how much he looks like my friend tom from nyc. and while he's not my type (sorry tom, though i suspect the feeling's mutual), the occaisional remanifestation of the resemblance between the two causes me to do a double take.

but the reason i'm letting myself go is because... he's not a normal guy. he majored in war studies at king's college (one of the departments i might have taken classes in had i gone their for study abroad in my junior year), and has a eerie conservative streak. we were talking the other night about the state of the world, and the brits were taking playful swipes at the usa and i returned with something like "yeah, but you all did a pretty thorough job of screwing it [the world] up with that empire of yours." normally, most of the brits i've run into have fairly realistic notions about the empire: yes, we've done our fair share of creating political problems throughout the globe. but this kid all of a sudden starts defending the empire--an empire, i feel it's important to emphasize, which no longer exists--saying that it brought many parts of the world into the 20th century. i mounted a feeble counter-assault, using examples of mossadeq and iran, and trying to bring india and pakistan into the mix, but he outfoxed me, knowing more about the history of that particular part of the world than i.

anyway, normally i find that kind of political discourse (what charlotte kept referring to as "tory ranting") a turn-off... and this guy isn't dripping with sexual promise, but still, i can't help but let my heart go pitter-pat when he looks at me. ew, gross, i can't believe i've just written that. but there's no suave way to say it, at least, not with the amount of time i currently have at my disposal.

all right, well, i'm going to abstain from going on ad nauseum. one more class to go, as i mentioned before, and i think i'm going to engage in the time-honored high-school tradition of showing a vaguely relevant movie in lieu of actually teaching my last class. i know, i'm a bad person, but i've come to terms with it.

i doubt i'll get to write again from this side of the pond, but i can't wait to see everyone... i'll be there any minute, now.